No news is good news with Gary Gnu.

It is generally said that people who talk too much generally don't listen well. Lately, people are talking too much and I am getting tired of listening. The other day I ran across some definitions in an old college textbook that quoted the famous book "The Devil's Dictionary". It made me feel better for not wanting to listen to people talk about themselves all the time. The Devil's Dictionary, written by American satirist Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce, was a newspaper weekly first collected as a book in 1906. If you've never read this, you can view the 1908 dictionary online here. Cynics would enjoy a glance the definitions...here are a few examples.

Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Conversation, n. A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.

Egoist, n. A person of low taste more interested in himself than me.

Heaven, n. A place where the wicked cease from troubling you with talk of their personal affairs, and the good listen with attention while you expound your own.


And hey, I thought Gary Gnu was a made up character for morning TV? Look here, Bierce defined a Gnu back in the early 1900s? who G-new? (sorry)

GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it is something like a thunderbolt, an earthquake and a cyclone.

And speak of the devil, remember this line from The Great Space Coaster??

"This Is Gary Gnu. And The No Gnews Is Good Gnews Show. The Only TV Gnews Program Guaranteed To Contain No Gnews Whatsoever." Fox should use that tag line..